Our church started its 21-day Revival of Repentance this evening and I was so happy to have yet another opportunity to sit down and spend some time with God. Although I pray every day, I so needed this time to really dig in and let Him know just how much I have appreciated all of the wonderful things He has done in my life. I wanted to share something here that came to me as I was sitting there surrounded by the sounds of my brothers and sisters praying to our wonderful God:
Lord, when I refused to follow you, I had no idea that you would never leave me. I thought surely You would disappear like so many of the things in my life that have gone away without explanation. I had given up on ever feeling loved and I was certain that you had turned your back on me although it was I who had turned away from You. But even when I turned away and decided that you were trying to destroy me by breaking my heart over and over again, I should have known that You were only trying to get me back on track. What felt like hell, was actually you pulling me away from the pit and closer to You and for that I’m forever grateful. Lord, I’m sorry that I didn’t realize sooner what You were trying to do. I feel like I’ve wasted so much time. But You are a patient and loving God whose mercy and grace are forever. This is why I love You more than anything in this world. This is why I need You more than anything in this world. Thank you for never letting go of me, Lord. You save my life every day and every day I need You more than the day before. Every day I get a little closer to you and thankfully, a little farther away from where I used to be. Every day You change me and strengthen me. Every day Your love amazes me and I can only hope to be able to give back to You a portion of what You give me. Thank You.
I am so thankful for every opportunity I have to talk to my God and to thank Him for what He has done and is doing in my life. I have been through so many horrible things, but He has always been there to lift me up and restore my joy. It is so hard to explain what His love means to me. I wish this for everyone I know and for those I haven’t met yet. That you would experience the love, mercy, and grace of a loving God who finds His joy in your faith.
It may sound sappy or even insane to some, but being able to draw strength from God’s love is absolutely liberating and joy-inducing. If you pray, do it often. If you don’t, do it as soon as possible. You’re missing out. There really is something wonderful about sitting in a room full of believers who are all praying to Him and reaching out for His hand. And even more wonderful is when you can sit alone with Him and just pour out everything you have knowing that He will replenish any and everything that you have lost. What a wonderful feeling!
Sweet is the song,
I’m singing today.
Trouble and sorrow have vanished away
for I have been redeemed.
Oh, I’m redeemed.
By love Divine.
Christ is mine.
All to Him, I now resign…
for I have been,
I have been redeemed.
~From the Church Hymnal~